Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
