PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
