p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
