Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
