dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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