I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize