My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Randomize
