Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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