i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
