she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
A+ Viking dick
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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