when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize