I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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