you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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