She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I have feelings that need drinking.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Randomize
