we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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