yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
