so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
