ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
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I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
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This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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