I love black thongs
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
We left the knife in your bed.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
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