This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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