i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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