dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
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Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
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I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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