Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
She's the barista slut.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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