Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Randomize
