Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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