note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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