he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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