just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
