Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
