Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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