A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I will be naked everywhere
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
