How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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