doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
