Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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