To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
