I like to think it a success when the cops are called
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize