Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail