If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating