guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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