Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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