Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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