is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
it's like heaven, but drunker
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
