he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
