so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
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bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
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I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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