Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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