We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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