Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I currently don't understand fingers.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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