I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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