Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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