just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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